Hey bud, how are you?
Shall we?
Curiosity.
Have you ever had the urge whilst driving to turn down a country lane just to see where it goes?
Well thats the best way to explain how my brain works. It has a constant need to be entertained. If something becomes familiar, it’s no longer appealing. When patterns can be distinguished, you can bet your bottom dollar my interest will take a vacation.
Curiosity is what keeps me going. Where as the majority of people get a dopamine kick from ticking a box, my brain scoffs at such simple pleasures. Somewhere in the depths of my being, there is a little boy who wants nothing more than to meddle with stuff. That same little boy finds immense pleasure in figuring out how things work.
Why does that clock tick like that? What makes that engine rev to only 8,000rpm? How does string theory work? How many dimensions could we plausibly be living in? Who figured out jam could be a thing?
The internet is a blessing and a curse for this reason. For example, I can find multiple answers within seconds, though sometimes, if theres a small whiff of uncertainty to that answer, I’ll launch an all out assault into finding things to counter it. Cut to 2am in the morning where I wonder what the fuck I’m doing with my life.
Another Existential Crisis.
A global pandemic and all work disappearing has resulted in more time spent being a father. Despite being an unexpected culture shock, it’s reconfigured my priorities.
Being a wedding photographer is a bizarre life. Don’t get me wrong, it has it’s perks, but for the majority of the time it feels as though I don’t fully belong to it. It’s the prestige of it all, the venues, the service, the inflated business aspects. It’s beautiful as a customer, but as a vendor, it can all start to feel a bit… Dunno. Samey and false. Maybe thats just me?!
The greatest perk though, are those who have chosen you, the photographer, to be involved in what could possibly be, the biggest moment of their lives. I still count myself extremely lucky to consider some of my couples now steadfast friends.
Like any other job, the honey moon period and novelty wears off. I’ve been shooting weddings since 2016 and the repetition of my routine is becoming a slog. Now understand, this isn’t me complaining, I fully accept that “the slog” is accustom to any career choice. It’s a given.
My “slog” begins as soon as any wedding ends. Once the distraction of shooting finishes, the pull to be home begins. Driving with all the windows down and music up, my next goal is to get home in time to see my family when they awake then get straight to editing.
This is where I become a bastard. Superstition runs riot, insisting I back up every card, then leave them untouched until the couple receive their collection. During these times I have a doomsday clock ticking overhead. Whilst the clock ticks, I need to be focusing on delivering. If I’m doing anything other than this, the world feels dangerously close to ending.
In these times grind culture takes over. If I’m feeling frivolous, I shoot multiple weddings and then throw some brand work into the mix. Shortly after that I can be found in a foetal position, questioning my ability and decision making.
The Remedy.
Just like yourself and the thousands standing behind you, I crave a healthy work life balance.
After my last foetal floor endeavour, I had to ask myself, is this sustainable? Despite kidding myself for months, I decided, none of the above was sustainable. Additionally, since having an ADHD diagnosis, I’ve had to account for the likelihood of my brain rejecting the “typical” wedding work patterns.
No two weddings are alike, each one has its own unique quirk. For that reason shooting weddings has kept me on my toes, not to mention learning the nuances of how different characters behave in front of a camera.
Though, as satisfying as the above may have been, the curious side of me wanted to explore my fascination of people more deeply.
This is where brand and lifestyle photography enters the fold.
When I shoot with brands and independent businesses, my main focus is getting inside the heads of those I’m working with. I want to know what makes them tick. What inspired them to choose their current endeavour? How do they want to impact the world? Why this choice?!
What stands out most during these moments is how focused I am. The sound of them talking or creating masks the sound of the cameras shutter and the whole world fades away. Fascinated sound’s to gushy, but it is the only word that adequately describes how I feel in these moments. I adore it. My imagination to what the future holds erupts to flames and I feel myself beginning to bond and root for those in front of me.
The Result
Since resurfacing from the pandemic, I have decided to listen to what my gut has been suggesting all along. I need to favour my curiosity and follow what my heart desires, documenting and sharing the stories behind businesses.
We’ve all seen the products that take our fancy on the shelves, but have you ever stopped to question, who made it? How was it made? What gives it that special feeling? To further that thought, how did it reach that shelf? Who chose to stock it and why?
These are the questions I’ll never tire of asking.
Choosing to follow this path has already opened a multitude of doors. Behind each door awaits another set of questions that require an answer.
The ability to share stories through a visual medium has me salivating profusely. Each and every story keeps my focus sharp to what I am producing. It keeps me hungry. Never wanting to be the person who drops the ball. Always keeping standards high.
Finally, the doomsday clock above my head can finally be reset.
I am in a field of my own, closer to home and eager to discover who/what lay ahead.